Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, with the most hilarious news about WWE’s latest show. Back in December, we learned that since NXT is now WWE’s third brand, WWE would launch a new developmental brand to feed wrestlers to NXT, who could then develop further to be fed to Raw and Smackdown. That’s right, comrades, a developmental feeder territory for the developmental feeder territory. That is what happens when you have too much money, comrades, and is an example of why capitalism must be denounced and destroyed. But enough about my hopes and dreams, amigos, because a new report from Fightful Select reveals that WWE has already filmed television for and designed graphics and a title belt for a new show called NXT EVOLVE.
According to the report, NXT EVOLVE will be more of a “fight” feel, be hosted by Josiah Williams, and as of now does not have any commentary. Oh my god, comrades! They rip off everything! Poor Shane McMahon. Raw Underground was ahead of its time!
Fightul says that both Gabe Saploski, originally reported as heading up the new show back in December, is also joined by Jeremy Borash on the production. They also say the show is “nothing like anything WWE is doing,” which means it might actually be an entertaining show, comrades. Because being entertaining is one thing WWE has failed at for years! Haw haw haw haw!
But seriously, maybe instead of signing more people and making more shows, WWE should try to make better use of the people they have on the roster already and make the shows they currently produce less crappy, comrades. Nah! That’s just crazy talk! Bring on the NXT EVOLVE, comrades! This time, things will be different. Haw haw haw haw haw! Until next time, my friends: socialism or death!
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After a successful fourteen-year career as a South American dictator, El Presidente faked his own death in 2013 in order to pursue his two true passions: rigging American elections for Joe Biden, and wrestling dirt sheet reporting. Since opportunities to rig the election for Joe Biden were few and far between until recently, El Presidente mostly focused on the wrestling dirt sheet reporting, where he became one of the best in the business. Unfortunately, the American CIA sabotaged his 1-900 hotline, the pinnacle of his country’s wrestling news technology, and imperialist hacks like Meltzer, Johnson, Sapp, and Satin took all the credit on their stupid websites. Finally, El Presidente has found a way to break into the American market by becoming a Bleeding Cool contributor, so get ready for the spread of great wrestling news and socialism, comrades!
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